"Sigh" moment (Good) / blues / PhD me / silence / Uncategorized

lonely road

I am sitting at my desk, working, and trying to do blog maintenance.  I realized I had nearly 60 drafts waiting to be edited and posted when the time was right.  The right time never really came, but I am reading and remembering and thinking “why not?” 

This one is a couple of years old.  I have definitely grown a lot since. 

so many times i’ve hurt and thought that no one understands

weathered by the work it takes to get there

when there is just a stop on the way

with a thousand more “theres” to go

only i know and only my heart holds the vision

so when my soul aches i act like aches can’t exist

and when misery taps at my shoulder i resolve it away.

i find myself with complaints on the tip of my tongue

i remember

i have gone the way of making my dreams reality.

and my dreams at times are a lonely road.

my dreams are just as much the process as they are the destination.

tired and feeling ripped to shreds, i remember what i asked for,

what my being is tasked for, and i speak to my dreams to remember these things:

“oh lonely road, it sometimes feels like you are my only companion.

some days it feels as though my only redemption will be the miles that i walk upon you.

but no road is so lonely that the sun cannot shine in.

no road is so lonely that the beauty of the path that is etched out on this earth for me cannot be remarkable.

no road is so lonely that i cannot smile at the blessing that the very lonely road can be.”

so many times i’ve smiled and thought that no one else can understand

because no one else can go this way.

this way that is only mine.

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